Friday, October 30, 2020

If I Could Turn Back Time

 Thought for the day: If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. [Maya Angelou]

I reckon we've all had to change our attitudes to survive this crazy Twilight Zone of a year. Fine, I can do that... I have done that. I'm sure you have, too.

But one thing I don't want to change is my darned clock. I mean, why in the name of all that's good and holy would anyone choose to nudge the clock back an hour this weekend? Who, I ask you, is delighted at the prospect of prolonging this year from Hades by adding an extra hour to it? Now, if the powers that be really want us to turn back time, I think they should make it worth our while. Why not crank it back ... oh, I dunno... maybe twenty years or so? Betcha that would garner near-unanimous support.






Could be worse, I suppose. 

At least we don't have to rearrange huge stones to change the time, eh?











                                      
                                                     A handy-dandy guide just for you...


Yeah, I know it's a pipe dream to think we could dig our heels in and forget about changing the clock. (Now if we could move it forward ... like past the election, past the pandemic, past the insanity...)

I trust that, like me, you've had enough of this stinking year. We've had our fill of the pandemic... the needless deaths... the racial divide... the protests and rioting... the toxic political atmosphere... the lies... the venomous hatred. It sucks. All of it. But wait! That's not all! Let's not forget the horrific wildfires, the hurricanes, and the floods. And how about them murder wasps? The brain-eating amoebae? And of course, for me, the worst thing, the most definitive thing, has been my husband's death. Some of you have lost loved ones this year, too. I say ENOUGH, already! We're full of this year. Fed up! Done with it. Then again, so many bad things have already happened this year,  what else could possibly go wrong?

WHOA!!! Scratch that! I take it back. If the zombie apocalypse is coming, I don't wanta know. This year has been for the birds. I tell ya, it's enough to make a saint swear.

Come to think of it, birds, too. Yep, I've got it on good authority that birds are fed up with this year, too. Specifically, ever since five African grey parrots were adopted (from five separate sources) by the Lincolnshire Wildlife Park in London, those angry little guys have been cursing a blue streak. To keep their fowl attitudes from spreading to the other parrots in the sanctuary, the ornery little potty mouths had to be moved away from the others. Quaranteed. So to speak. Hmmmm, I bet that didn't do much to improve their attitudes...



 On the plus side, this year... this pandemic... this unrest... can't last forever. Before we know it, it'll be winter. Then a new year... and hopefully, a better year. A more hopeful year. Less stress. More joy.

                               But FYI: best to be careful this winter. I mean, it's this kinda year...     


 Sure, this year has given us all a ton of challenges, but it hasn't been all bad.  There's been some good stuff, too. Like I found a really good company to fix our air conditioning when it went belly-up smack dab in the middle of our Georgian summer. I've also gotten pretty darned good at fixing toilets, if I must say so myself. Plus, all that hand-washing and disinfecting has made toilet-cleaning easier than ever. It seems the stuff has permeated my skin, so now the toilet gets cleaned every time I tinkle. Woo HOO!  Oooh, and our younger son got me set up on Netflix. Awesome! I loved it, and quickly developed a brand new binge-watching talent. Until it stopped working. (My TV isn't "smart," so he fed the stream through our DVD player... which decided to stop working. ) BUT... a new TV... a "smart" one... is supposed to be delivered today. I also got a cellphone. A first for me. Something I never ever wanted, but I got tired of my friends and family insisting I "had" to get one. So I did. A week ago. I hope they're all happy now. (Just because I have it doesn't mean I'm gonna use it.) Just kidding. A little. At first, I kept it nearby... in its box. Turned off. (sigh) Fine. It's still in its box, but at least, I turned the darned thing on. Baby steps, right?

Anyhow, chins up, people! (Otherwise, you'd be staring at your feet or your boobs all day. And that's just weird.)  Maybe if we were to rate 2020, we'd struggle to give it any stars at all, and we wouldn't recommend it to anyone, but this, too, shall pass. Honest. Sure, if 2020 were a drink, it'd be hemlock or maybe that yummy colonoscopy prep stuff.. If it were a movie, it'd be ... what? Baby Boss, maybe? Sausage Party? Which song...? Oh, I've got it. It'd have to be the dogs barking Jingle Bells. Come on... help. Which song and/or movie do you think suits the essence of 2020? Sock it to me. I've got nothing but time.

                                     Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.
                                 
                                                              

                                                                                 

64 comments:

  1. Sending love, cat. https://youtu.be/vACo-AuE6KA

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    1. Thanks, sweetie. I'm sending love right back atcha. I hope you're taking care of yourself. I didn't listen to that entire soundtrack, but I did listen to the first song. Wow. Beautiful voice, and heart-wrenching lyrics. I'll have to listen to the rest later.

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  2. Dear Susan, I can't think of a more powerful song to invoke the best of the past to inform the future than the clip you posted. Time has been kind to Cher's voice and stage-mastery. Likewise, your own resilience amazes me. You are remarkable. Thank you.

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    1. Dear Geo dude, I think Cher must have her own personal fountain of youth. And I bet it tastes better than that awful-tasting stuff in St. Augustine, too. Nobody could possibly stomach enough of that to test its power. Blecch! I'd rather get old. No, wait! Stop the presses... I already have! One wish granted... :)

      Thanks for your kind words. Just doing what I've gotta do, just like everybody else. We're all pretty darned tough, given the opportunity.

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  3. Smiling. And of course pigeons would see an open mouth as a challenge.
    Our clocks went forward a few weeks ago. Believe me, it didn't improve the year.
    My smart phone continues to be much smarter than I am. I hope you triumph over yours.

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    1. Smiling is good. :)

      Oh, absolutely. Not that we're likely to get any snow, (Then again, with the way this year is going so far, we could get a few feet of it...) but if we do, I'll be sure to keep my trap shit while looking skyward.

      I hope to conquer this darned phone. I used to like being "the smartest one in the room", so to speak but between the phone and the TV that's coming today, my relative level of "smarts" is sinking quickly.

      Take care, sweet lady.

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  4. Ye, this has been a hell of year, and it ain't over yet! Love the story of the cussing parrots, I must admit I've done a fair share of cussing myself this year, but WTF! I have to do SOMETHING! Let's hope for a better year to come! Stay well and safe, hugs, Valerie

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    1. Nope, it ain't over yet. But I'm hoping our upcoming election will help mitigate some of the misery. Early voting numbers have been so high, I'm feeling mighty optimistic...

      Yeah, I know cussing doesn't really change or fix anything, but I can relate to those foul-mouthed parrots. Sometimes you've just gotta VENT! This year is definitely one of those times.

      You stay well and safe, too. Hugs back atcha.

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  5. 2020 has, without a doubt, been the most bizarre year I've ever experienced (and I've known quite a few.....)
    Which song do I think suits the essence of 2020? I'd say "21st Century Schizoid Man" by King Crimson (I'll bet nobody has ever heard of that one, huh?).

    I absolutely DESPISE the semiannual Changing of the Clocks ritual and I refuse to participate in it. All of my clocks remain blissfully unmolested.
    That "Guide to Putting Your Clocks Back" is right on target when it says that you need a Masters in Electronic Engineering to set the oven clock.

    Cursing parrots??
    Hell, I could say things that would make the parrots blush....

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    1. Oh wow, cowboy, you nailed it! You're right; I never heard of that song before, but I just listened to it. The clashing, somewhat jarring dissonance of the music, combined with those lyrics create the perfect accompaniment to 2020.

      Oooh, not just a cowboy poet, but a rebel, too! It's cool that you don't change your clocks. As much as I dislike the whole notion of changing the time twice a year, I don't fight it. Nowadays, I have enough trouble remembering what day it is, so it's best if I stay in lockstep time-wise.

      HA! Maybe you could teach those parrots a thing or two, but don't be so sure. There are some videos on youtube that illustrate just how blue their language is. Naughty... but funny as all get-out.

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  6. It will pass and no matter what happens going into the next year, we'll get through it. Hopefully with less hate though.
    There's a song by Ayeron called Everybody Dies that's actually very upbeat, like maniacal sarcasm. That might fit.

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    1. Wow! That's quite a song! I bet it'd be amazing to see it performed live. Maniacal sarcasm, huh? Uh-huh, uh-huh. Maybe that's why I like it... (Then again, it could be the amazing lyrics.)

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  7. super post. And yes I have to get out my manual every time to fix the car clock. I love Netflix - you will be so happy with the smart TV and you can get dumber along with the rest of us. I'll email a list of my recommendations. Nothing like Halloween, full moon, and time change - Kaboom!

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    1. Hi-ya, sweet lady!!! Thank you... again. Your witty Halloween card is on display on the shelf above our fireplace... right next to a silly ghost figure stretching his mouth out of shape to make a funny face. :)

      I know I'm gonna love Netflix. I was binge watching "Grey's Anatomy" before I lost it. (Well, I COULD watch it on my laptop, but I'd rather not. My PC has given up the ghost, (Happy Halloween!) and Mike's computer seems to be infested with a virus, so I'm using my poor old laptop sparingly.)

      Kaboom, indeed. Let's hope some of the changes coming up next week will be good ones.

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  8. A smart phone is a must now. Many restaurants require you to scan a code to pull up the menu and order from it. If you don't have a phone, I guess you just don't eat.

    How blissfully ignorant we were a year ago, not knowing what was brewing in China and what they would unleash on the world.

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    1. A must, huh? That's what they've been telling me, and maybe in time, I'll come to enjoy it. (It could happen...)

      Yep, what a difference a year makes.

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  9. Thanks for the laughs! The pic with the pigeon cracks me up. But I think my tortoises would disagree with the turtle pic - it seems like my two get stressed when we're stressed! Oh, the guilt! :)

    No matter which way we change the clocks, it messes with my energy and sleep. But I do have to say that I am one of those people who like that it's lighter earlier. I know, my weirdness never ends. :)

    Take good care of yourself!

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    1. HA! My cats are psychic (and a little psycho) when it comes to picking up on my mood and trying to cheer me up, but I didn't realize tortoises were that intuitive, too.

      I have to admit, I'm looking forward to it being brighter in the mornings, too. As an early riser, it'd be nice to have the sun get up before I do every once in a while.

      You take care of yourself, too, (And no cussing in front of those sweet tortoises!)

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  10. I'd be happy if they jus let he give alone. I get turned around every time it changes. and it takes a long time to adjust. I 'd say we are all looking forward to a better year than this one. It's going to be a great celebration this New year!

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    1. It'd be nice if we settled on a standard time frame and then left our poor clocks be, wouldn't it?

      Yes, a better year. Dunno how much celebrating I'll be doing on New Years... it's never felt the same without Guy Lombardo... :)

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  11. Never mind the extra hour; this year had an extra DAY! Although that was before all of our lives changed.... A minor point - Lincolnshire is about 130 miles by road from London!
    As you have Netflix, you may be able to catch Afterlife with Ricky Gervais. It's guaranteed to make to laugh...and cry.
    CLICK HERE for Bazza’s famously fascinating Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

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    1. HA! Yeah, you're right. Nothing like the cosmos adding insult to injury, eh? :)

      Thanks for the suggestion. Once I get Netflix up and going again, I'll be sure to check out that show.

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  12. Wonderful Susan - you've had a bad year ... take me back 20 years ok ... as long as I can take back today's knowledge ... so I can avoid the pitfalls I've fallen into!

    Lovely to read the cheery/negative post ... life goes on doesn't it - things work, things don't ... and that hour - we had that last weekend ... it makes more sense here in the UK ... we're probably only as wide as New York - so not much time change necessary ... but international travel is a pain at this time of year.

    Just glad things are working out for you - as you say slowly ... my phone stays in the flat! Netflix is fun ... well I enjoyed it when I had it in Canada ... take care and keep cheerful ... we need peace - have a happy weekend with that extra hour! Big hugs - Hilary

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    1. This year has been a challenge for everyone, but those of us who are still standing are still managing to muddle through somehow. We just have to keep on keeping on. Just a couple more months and we can relegate this whole stinkin' year to the record books.

      You have a super weekend, too, Hilary. Big hugs back atcha. Cheers!

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  13. Susan, I'm so happy to see you. We've had a lot of losses in 2020, but I've kept my sense of humor and so have you. I was extremely grateful to have my smart phone when my car died on I-95. Made it easy to contact the police and my motor club. I would love to turn back time and wiggle around like Cher with my ass hanging out. I've always liked her. Thank you for being here.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Janie, I'm happy to be here, and very glad to hear from you. :)

      Yeah, my head knows cellphones provide a certain level of security, especially for women alone. Just 'cause I know it doesn't mean my heart has to like it, though. In due time, perhaps.

      Hey! You don't have to go back twenty years to dance like Cher. (Nobody says we have to look good while we're doing it!)

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    2. I'm afraid that if I pranced around like Cher that someone would think my butt is a giant balloon and stick a pin in it to try to deflate it.

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    3. HA! Nah. Dance is an expression of joy, so it's always a thing of beauty. So wiggle away, my dear.

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  14. It's really good to 'see' you, Susan! Not concern exactly, but you've been on my mind. Tickled to know you've both a smart phone and television. (Careful now. The former's pretty addictive.)

    I can't identify any of her songs, but this saying on FB made me laugh out loud: "Adding an hour to 2020 is like getting a bonus track on a Yoko Ono album."

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    1. Thanks. It's good to be "seen."

      HA! I'm not very familiar with Ono's work either, but the gist of that message is still funny. And very clever.

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  15. What else could possibly go wrong? Seriously, Susan, with everything that's happened this year do you really have to tempt fate? I suspect you're just single-handedly given Trump another 4 years!

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    1. HA! Nope, I don't wanta tempt fate. UGH! Don't you go trying to hang THAT particular plague on me. :)

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  16. I think daylight saving is a waste of time, but try and convince a politician, any politician.
    I wouldn't want to be turning back time, that would mean eventually having to go through 2020 again and believe me once is enough! There's been some good, but not enough to outweigh the bad this time. 2021 just has to be better, but only if all the rioting and racism stops. And hopefully a better President.

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    1. You're right. Convincing a politician about the time changes has about as much chance of success as convincing them about term limits.

      Good point. Okay, so you're right about living through 2020 once being more than enough. Still, I wouldn't mind reliving some of those past 20 years...

      We've gotta hope for better in 2021.

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  17. You summed it up perfectly for all of us! Thank you, especially for the reminder about the clocks. Gosh I hate that job. I'm with you on turning back time 20 years, even 30. Oh yeah, what fun that could be!

    Even though the election will be over on the 3rd we won't be able to breathe until January 20th. But if the right man wins maybe the air won't be so toxic. Fingers crossed!

    Hoping for better in 2021 for sure!

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    1. I dunno about "perfectly," but I think we all agree that year has been the pits. Time to climb back out of the hole and enjoy some sunshine again.

      I'm all for getting rid of the toxic air, but I'm afraid I'm gonna have to keep breathing in it for now. I can't hold my breath that long.

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  18. I really wanted to hear all the parrots curse, but I guess it was not on cable where that is allowed. How funny and satisfying that would have been.

    Netflix was good in March and probably April, but now I think I have seen them all, except for the blow um ups and scary ones. For entertainment, I watch House Hunters and Naked and Afraid. I am addicted to them, especially on rainy days. Both shows are about people looking for shelter except one couple dresses better than the other. They also are both cheeky.

    It has been a terrible year and so much loss, dear Susan. I think of you often and hope your upbeat posts reflect how you are getting thru this time. You are a warrior and you will use the strength that you have to move forward and find peace. You will conquer that phone and that smart TV. If the TV is a ROKU, welcome to my world of “what the hell”. Truly though, once you learn it (remember, it is called “smart”), it is pretty good and you have many choices.

    All my kids have T shirts with 2020 written on them. They are all different but the one I like best is 2020 SUCKS! My son makes lots of socially distanced friends when he wears it.

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    1. Oh you CAN hear those parrots cursing. There's plenty of videos on youtube that let it all hang out. They're a hoot.

      ALL of them??? You've seen ALL of them on Netflix? Yipes, I didn't think that was even possible. There are sooooo many shows on there, I figured I could watch every day for the rest of my life and still not see 'em all. I was doing a pretty good job binge-watching "Grey's Anatomy," though. Right up to season 13, I think it was. And there's a lot more shows I'd like to do the same thing to... with NO commercials!!! The best thing EVER!

      I'm getting along about as well as can be expected. Still upbeat for the most part, but going through Mike's stuff rips my heart out. I have to stop, take a step back, and find something else to do for a while. Got the window shutters and front porch columns painted... and repainted one of the bathrooms. It felt good to "complete" a job. It's gonna take longer than I have to get it all done around here. Hurricane Zeta knocked down a LOT of huge branches in our yard, so that gave me something "different" to do yesterday, whether I wanted to or not. One of our amateur radio antennas came down, too, but I'm not about to try to put it back up again.

      Take care, sweet lady. %hanks for caring.


      (shhh) I like "Naked and Afraid," too. Especially the XL versions. I wonder if you yell at the TV when it's on... like when they act "surprised" at how many bugs there are, or how much their feet hurt, or heavens to mergatroid... when they drink crappy water without bothering to boil it first. I mean, don't those people WATCH the show???

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    2. It just seems I have seen all of them; what I meant to say, just the ones that interest me, and really, lately, very little interest me. Yesterday, I watched the Helen Reddy movie. It was OK.

      Yes, I also wonder if many of the people on the N&A ever watched the program I read that they are only paid $5,000 for doing it. I would imagine that amount wouldn’t pay their medical bills for all the bug bites and infections they must get.

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    3. Now that we're post-election, I hope your overall interest level has risen. :) We may not be dancing in the streets, but we're dancing our little hearts out on the inside.

      Wow, they get 5K for the opportunity to cook or freeze their butts off, get more bug bites than they ever imagined possible, and drink and eat potentially tainted food and water? God love 'em. There isn't enough money in the world to entice me to anything like that, but I'm glad they do... just to entertain the rest of us.

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  19. Yep. 2020 sure has stunk in many a way. lol the parrots had enough of it and showed all how they felt.

    You actually got a cellphone? And here you said you never would get one. Guess never say never, huh? lol

    Netflix has a lot to binge indeed.

    But but I sometimes like looking down...depending on who's in front of me.

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    1. Yep, I finally got a darned cellphone. As much as I didn't want to, I know it's the smart thing to do. Without Mike beside me in the car or at the other end of the radio if I need him, I had to go an alternative route in case of emergency.

      HA! Yeah, good point. Some people make looking at one's feet a better choice.

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    2. It does come in handy.

      That they surely do.

      I went and checked the book page and everything is working there. Also just bought it myself to see and it allows me to scroll past the chapter and the words are there, not as pretty as the cover but they are there lol. Not sure why you can't see it. That is weird.

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    3. Not weird. I'm just "special." (Bless my little heart.)

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  20. Hello Susan. Just popped in to see how you're going. Most states in Australia practise daylight saving except my state of Queensland in the Deep North, LOL. We happily zip around out of sync with other states and that's the case with border closures too. All paid off now and most of Oz is covid free. Keep getting the odd case when someone returns from overseas carrying the virus.

    Meanwhile, we watch in horror at Europe's and the US's figures.

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    1. Hi-ya, Denise. Good to hear from you. I'm still hanging in there.

      Lucky you. It's a pain in the patootie to change the time on all of our clocks. I've got all of them taken care of except for the one on Mike's side of the bed. I guess it needs his touch to work properly. It's totally ignoring me.

      (Knock on wood) I hope your area STAYS covid-free. We look at those still-rising figures with horror, too.

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  21. There's a meme going around that says 'if 2020 was a bath bomb it would be a toaster' YEP! But one of my 2020 good things is Susan's still blogging :-)
    Online I am well behaved, as though I were teaching a class, but offline and out of the training hall I am a grey parrot. Doubly so this year.
    (Also, Afterlife is a Netflix treasure, you should watch it, but Google it first because it centres on the sourly painful grief of a recently widowed man - and yes, it is a comedy.)
    Wishing us all an upturn of events - actually think it might be rather stress relieving to have a zombie apocalypse and go out knocking heads off! xxx

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    1. I haven't seen that toaster meme, but it's fitting. Thank you so much for your support. I still dunno for sure how long I'll continue blogging, but maybe...

      HA! Yeah, I guess I've become more of a grey parrot this year than I ever would've imagined.

      I'll definitely check out Afterlife. It may sound strange, but watching shows that feature recently widowed people is kinda helpful. I find it much easier to cry while watching a show than I've ever allowed myself to in response to things happening in my life. The shows offer a bit of catharsis, ya know? Plus... a comedy??? I'm in!

      Not interested in a zombie apocolypse, but now that the election is behind us, (kinda) a lot of the stress is relieved. It's awesome to see so many people dancing in the streets all over the country. Their joy is contagious. xxx

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  22. I heard about those parrots! I love your cartoons. Let's all hope this horrible fiasco of a year is over soon. And that 2021 is much better.

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    1. Thank goodness, this year is rushing toward its conclusion, and now that the election is (almost) behind us, I've got a lot more hope for 2021. Happy days are here again...?

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  23. A Smart TV and a cell phone? Now you are ready for anything! If you haven’t already seen it, I highly recommend the comedy “Schitt’$ Creek.” It won 15 Emmys this year and is on Netflix, as well as some cable TV channels. I also think you’ll enjoy “The Crown” which is an original Netflix classic about Queen Elizabeth and the Royal Family. The acting and writing is brilliant. I’m sorry this has been such a horrific year for you, but your courage, strength, and loving family have helped and will continue to help you through it. In the meantime, you have become a skillful plumber, painter, detective and I’m sure the list goes on. Hopefully, goodness will triumph over evil, and a covid vaccine will be available in the very near future. Take care of yourself, my friend.

    Julie

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    1. Yeah, I know, right? My kids and grandkids are dragging me into the 21st century, whether I want to be here or not. :)

      Unfortunately, I'm not alone. This year has been horrific for a lot of people all over the world. We're gonna have to stay up past midnight on New Year's Eve just to make sure this year leaves. (Kinda like the prez...)

      You take care, too, kiddo. I like to think of you out dancing in Chicago's streets... :)

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  24. Hmm a song to reflect 2020... Hammer Time? We surely got hammered. I lost my mommy this year. It wasn't pretty but I am surely glad we got that time with her. IF Covid hadn't been here, we wouldn't have, and not that I'm glad for Covid, I'm not. Just agreeing with you that not all was bad this year. That 7 weeks was difficult, and a precious gift as well. It made me instantly sad to hear about your husband when I did, I guess because I was still grieving too. Heck, I wanted to get pics of her great-grands printed for her yesterday, and then I instantly remembered that postage doesn't go to heaven. ;) And as for this election, it's crazy. Crazier than crazy. Thanks to Covid and the candidates.

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    1. Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. No matter what the circumstances are, we're never ready to lose our moms. Mine died in '96, and I still miss her.

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  25. Whenever I get really truly fed up, I re-read Viktor Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning. It's written like a text book, but during the worst of my life's moments, the lessons I learned from that book keep me putting one foot in front of the other.

    Hugs. Big super squeezes cause this is a shitty freaking year...especially when you lose your sweetie.

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    1. How cool! Don't ask me which one, but the other day, a guy on some show I was watching was reading that book! Must be a sign, eh? I'll have to order a copy. Thanks.

      Hugs back atcha, kiddo. The year may be a little shitty, but at least we can find toilet paper now... :)

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  26. Just to check if every thing is good. I hope that you and your loved ones are safe and healthy.
    Pls. be careful

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    1. Thanks for checking on me. I'm hanging in there, and I hope you are, too. Take care, and stay safe.

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