tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post2925273563170977055..comments2024-03-28T21:32:06.704-04:00Comments on I Think; Therefore, I Yam: Building BridgesSusan Flett Swiderskihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comBlogger70125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-76823595798371291722017-10-31T11:38:39.811-04:002017-10-31T11:38:39.811-04:00Thanks, Launna. You're right. We all need to l...Thanks, Launna. You're right. We all need to learn the art of forgiveness, but it sounds like you've already made great strides. It's unusual for a teenager to have the kind of maturity needed to make the decision to forgive. You're a special lady.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-28702026724658895562017-10-30T23:28:18.309-04:002017-10-30T23:28:18.309-04:00Susan this was so beautifully written... I strongl...Susan this was so beautifully written... I strongly believe that the only way we can grow is to forgive... Not all of us are going to have to forgive such heinous acts but if we come up against them, we need to find a way to forgive as you say, so we can be free. <br /><br />My ex stepmother was abusive both physically and emotionally... I lived 9 years of my childhood in fear, wondering when the next shoe would drop... out of no where... One day when I was 15, I came to a realization that unless I forgave her, I would always be bound to her... I forgave her and when I had my own children, I did not abuse them... Who knows if I had held onto that anger if I would have... <br /><br />Also, when my ex husband raped me, I lived in fear for almost a year... when I finally went to court, he had no remorse for what he had done and he lied about me... I called him and I told him, I forgive you... I need to forgive you for me and for Valentina... one day when I sit her down to tell her... I want her to forgive him too... <br /><br />You really got to the heart of forgiveness... I hope that one day, we can all learn that art of forgiveness... I work on it daily, it's not easy xox Launna https://www.blogger.com/profile/09447311902825477772noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-6790563000017958622017-10-30T13:16:11.925-04:002017-10-30T13:16:11.925-04:00Yeah, I never thought about it, but you're rig...Yeah, I never thought about it, but you're right. Maybe forgiveness IS contrary to our nature, which is why it's so darned tough to do sometimes. Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-32869849042301047212017-10-30T13:10:51.466-04:002017-10-30T13:10:51.466-04:00You're right. Sometimes forgiveness requires a...You're right. Sometimes forgiveness requires a lot more strength than we can muster on our own. I wish you all the best in finding it. You've got this!Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-57212156288614286322017-10-30T12:56:38.755-04:002017-10-30T12:56:38.755-04:00I think it's a tough subject, but I don't ...I think it's a tough subject, but I don't know if it's controversial. I think most of us would agree to the ideals regarding the benefits of forgiveness. On the other hand, I admit some self-centered people seem to feel entitled to forgiveness, regardless of how outrageous their behavior may be. I'd lump them into the category of people who are afflicted with affluenza.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-41827041099695271272017-10-30T12:51:51.862-04:002017-10-30T12:51:51.862-04:00You're right. Saying the words is a lot easier...You're right. Saying the words is a lot easier than living them, and the saying ain't all that easy, either. The Amish approach it as intentional behavior. They believe in the necessity of forgiving, and even if the "feeling" isn't there from the start, they say the words and then model their actions to support it.<br /><br />Thanks, kiddo.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-36860934980853036262017-10-30T12:35:50.439-04:002017-10-30T12:35:50.439-04:00Hi, Hels. Thank you so much for stopping by and le...Hi, Hels. Thank you so much for stopping by and leaving a comment. It's very nice to meet you. :)<br /><br />I can imagine what bitterness you must feel over that person's heartless comment. It's a blessing that the doctor's heart was in good working order and her comment was recognized for the inanity that it was. <br /><br />If you're still communicating with that person, you're a bigger person than many of us. <br /><br />Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-42005304628653788582017-10-30T12:15:30.102-04:002017-10-30T12:15:30.102-04:00I love this, especially the story about the Amish ...I love this, especially the story about the Amish embracing those parents. Forgiveness is a powerful thing. It goes against our very human nature, which makes our blood boil and tells us we just need to hurt them back.<br /><br />I'm not saying I'm that big of a person, mind you, but I acknowledge that the peace that comes from true forgiveness far outweighs lingering hatred that will just eventually leave you bitter and angry at the world.A Beer for the Showerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17029139745335325356noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-55535959729897765092017-10-30T12:07:50.356-04:002017-10-30T12:07:50.356-04:00I think we all struggle with forgiveness. If we di...I think we all struggle with forgiveness. If we didn't, it wouldn't be nearly as heartfelt or meaningful. You aren't alone. I find it much easier to forgive others than myself, too. Why we expect "more" of ourselves than we do of others, I dunno. <br /><br />Indifference is definitely a step up from hatred. I can relate. Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-72104952253857766122017-10-30T05:45:12.824-04:002017-10-30T05:45:12.824-04:00I know exactly what you mean. A close member of my...I know exactly what you mean. A close member of my own family, my own flesh and blood hurt us and others so badly that it's almost impossible to think of him and not hate everything about him. <br /><br />But I know it's something that I have to work on, because I can feel the bitterness poisoning my thoughts and I don't want that in my life. <br /><br />So it's something I'm praying for, because it's not something I'm capable of on my own.Misha Gerrickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06364173848456424521noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-41045689176551825192017-10-30T04:46:33.595-04:002017-10-30T04:46:33.595-04:00This is such a controversial subject. People do sa...This is such a controversial subject. People do say things knowingly and yet expect to get forgiven when called out on it. Kelly Steelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09030019966183220952noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-17896206783834432452017-10-29T22:37:53.407-04:002017-10-29T22:37:53.407-04:00I learned at an early age that holding onto hate w...I learned at an early age that holding onto hate was destructive. Forgiveness is easy, saying it, but living it takes more courage than most have. Yet, it's that kind of courage that is needed, especially today.<br />Beautiful post, thank you.Yolanda Renéehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09085436784133103221noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-76242176784914892162017-10-29T21:17:38.058-04:002017-10-29T21:17:38.058-04:00Thank you for the post.
A relative of my brother ...Thank you for the post.<br /><br />A relative of my brother asked for the Professor of Haematology to "put down" my beautiful, alert, very literate mother, in front of me!!! The doctor refused of course, but I never recovered and neither did my mother. She died a fortnight later and I was hospitalised a year later with heart surgery.<br /><br />Even if I ever said "I forgive you" to that relative, she would know that the words would be fake. I agree that the real damage is done to the person who cannot let go, but forgiveness seems impossible.Helshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02849907428208235392noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-3703704107358236052017-10-29T19:36:51.901-04:002017-10-29T19:36:51.901-04:00Oh Susan ... you could have made this easier to sw...Oh Susan ... you could have made this easier to swallow. (*smile*) How I struggle with forgiveness! Ironically, I find it easier to forgive others than I do myself. <br /><br />In the last few years, however, my feelings have gone from hatred to simple indifference. No useless energy expended. That's a start Mevely317https://www.blogger.com/profile/14786988262452989091noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-17867182304123062422017-10-29T13:17:41.758-04:002017-10-29T13:17:41.758-04:00Thanks, Lisa! I'm glad you liked the post, and...Thanks, Lisa! I'm glad you liked the post, and I'm thrilled you bought my book. I hope you enjoy it!Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-81652985437155973232017-10-29T13:09:58.138-04:002017-10-29T13:09:58.138-04:00Yes, forgiveness can really be tough at times, but...Yes, forgiveness can really be tough at times, but it's worth the effort, because not forgiving is a heavy load to bear.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-67277738514131404912017-10-29T13:01:27.480-04:002017-10-29T13:01:27.480-04:00Thanks.
I'm not sure I could, either, and I a...Thanks.<br /><br />I'm not sure I could, either, and I also hope never to be tested to that extent.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-79199710261318313832017-10-29T06:02:22.792-04:002017-10-29T06:02:22.792-04:00Beautiful Susan :-) This world has enough division...Beautiful Susan :-) This world has enough division, only connection can save us xxx <br />And in unrelated news, I have finally actually bought your book, instead of just thinking about buying it - it is in the post, should be here by Wednesday, I'm jolly happy about that :-) Lisa Southardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09711376747848601409noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-20497088346867735642017-10-28T21:29:52.522-04:002017-10-28T21:29:52.522-04:00I've seen big forgiving before. I've been ...I've seen big forgiving before. I've been part of it myself, as well, though thankfully nothing on the scale offered here. It's tough, it's not impossible, and it's definitely freeing (even if you don't think at the time you're not forgiving, that you're bound).mail4roseyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17850985344834209198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-81661283507424678742017-10-28T20:31:36.665-04:002017-10-28T20:31:36.665-04:00What a great, inspiring post!
I remember the mur...What a great, inspiring post! <br /><br />I remember the murders in the Amish community, too, and was amazed at the compassion and forgiveness they showed. Not sure I would be able to do the same - and hoping I will never encounter the situation!Pixel Peeperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17553862902461169270noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-31119475128129998812017-10-28T16:59:15.196-04:002017-10-28T16:59:15.196-04:00Cat... so true.Cat... so true.angryparsniphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17236094827257446781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-55412812719470728872017-10-28T15:34:48.409-04:002017-10-28T15:34:48.409-04:00My ex-husband is like Trump, too! It's the nar...My ex-husband is like Trump, too! It's the narcissism/psychopath thing.Janie Junebughttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10573607241326291404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-91894045002892716032017-10-28T11:38:33.246-04:002017-10-28T11:38:33.246-04:00Yeah, I agree that it'd be easier to forgive t...Yeah, I agree that it'd be easier to forgive the family members of a killer than it would be to forgive the killer himself. We'd have to dig down reeeeeally deep to find that kind of compassion within us.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-67906422775256282842017-10-28T11:31:01.996-04:002017-10-28T11:31:01.996-04:00Sorry... I really MUST stop making you cry...
Und...Sorry... I really MUST stop making you cry...<br /><br />Understandable. Some hurts are so deep, they leave shadows of pain that never completely go away. Perhaps for you, it is enough that you give him no power over your life and are at peace without him. That may be a better characterization of what I achieved with my father. Once I realize he could no longer hurt me and had no power over me, I found peace, which I may have mistaken for forgiveness.Susan Flett Swiderskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09425315552148200073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6034142332858737641.post-40217918263336220952017-10-28T11:24:28.538-04:002017-10-28T11:24:28.538-04:00Wow.
Not sure I'd be able to forgive someone...Wow. <br /><br />Not sure I'd be able to forgive someone for killing my loved one, frankly. (I'd find it much easier to forgive a family member/parent who suffered in their own way as well.)<br />Giahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10026292498250130247noreply@blogger.com