Aloha OY!

Thought for the day:  Hawaii's state fish is the humuhumunukunukuapua. Now, that's an aloha OY! mouthful.

Wow, it's gonna be hard to make fun of Hawaii. (But I'll try!)

In February of 1970, my husband and I met there for an unbelievable week of R&R magic. (According to the U.S. Army, it was Rest & Relaxation, but most of the soldiers called it I&I. Use your imagination.) Anyway,  I flew there from cold, dreary, middle-of-winter Maryland, and he flew there from the steamy jungles of Vietnam. For me, it was Heaven. For him, it was a surreal respite from Hell.

It's traditional for visitors to be greeted with a lei when deplaning in Hawaii, but it wasn't a high priority on the military base, so the soldiers missed out on that little nicety when they landed. Not that they cared. But my better half and I kinda made up for it later:  We were strolling hand-in-hand on the white sands of Waikiki Beach the evening it happened. Picture it. The sun was setting. Every gorgeous snapshot you've ever seen of the breathtaking sunsets in Hawaii are absolutely true. Amazing colors. Palm trees, silhouetted against vibrant streaks in the sky, swaying gently in the breeze. The sweet heady scent of tropical flowers. The lapping of the waves coming into shore. And there we were, together for the first time in eight months. We sat down on the beach to gaze out over the water and to soak in the incredible surroundings, to soak in the fact that we were together again. Like I said, surreal. Then, a sweet young Hawaiian boy came up from behind us and slipped a fragrant frangipani and orchid lei around my neck. "For the pretty lady," he said. Then he slipped one around my hubby's neck, too, and said, "And for you, sir." We both smiled and thanked him, and then he thrust out his hand, palm up. "One dollah, please," he said. "EACH."

We paid him, but it cracked us up and kinda broke the romantic spell, ya know? As the Hawaiians say, Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru, which means Death to mainland scum, but leave your money.


How about a few quick facts about the Aloha State state before going on to look at a handful of pictures and check out their laws?  Although most of us can only name four or five off the tops of our heads, Hawaii is actually made up of eight islands: Niihau, Kauai, Oahu, Maui, Molokai, Lanai, Kahoolawe, and the big island of Hawaii. Although their native language contains a lot of super long,  hard-to-pronounce words, their alphabet only contains twelve letters: all five vowels, and the consonants H,K,L,M,N,P, and W. (Just think how long their words would be if they had all twenty-six letters to work with!) The cost of living is high there, but the living is easy. The most common footwear is slippers, the only suit most people own is a bathing suit, and nice clothes means a tee shirt without a puka. (seashell necklace)

Okay, some pictures.

Everybody knows about Hawaiian pineapples. But did you know Hawaii grows a third of the world's supply of them, which translates to approximately 320,000 tons a year? Just about every drink you order there comes with a fresh spear of pineapple in it. (Best iced tea ever!) A couple other food tidbits: Hawaii is the only state in the U.S. that grows coffee and vanilla

In addition to all kinds of neat shopping places, Don Ho's place was also located in the International Market Place, which was a very short walk from our hotel. We went in there one evening to have a drink, and the emcee dedicated the next song to all the couples there on R&R. (Besides us, there were two other couples.) Awwww. Nice, huh? Know what the song was? Leaving on a Jet Plane. Talk about a downer.

The flowers of Hawaii are absolutely stunning. The one in the picture is a bird of paradise, but there are all kinds and colors of flowers at every turn. Everywhere. Vibrant colors. And every single one of them, sweet-smelling.

The water is the most beautiful blue-green, and so clean, you can easily see the bottom. Beaches? White sands. More than one hundred world-renown beaches ring Honolulu alone. Great swimming and snorkeling. And a surfer's paradise.

Iolani Palace, in downtown Honolulu, is the only royal palace in the United States. And it had electric lights four years before the White House did.

The Polynesian Cultural Center was one of my personal favorites. There, visitors experience the music and dancing of a multitude of Polynesian islands. The instruments were like nothing we'd ever seen, and the rhythms and dances were mesmerizing.

Kilauea is the world's most active volcano. Its most recent eruption began in 1983, and is still going strong. But it isn't a big violent eruption like you see in the movies; it's more of a gentle ooze of lava flowing from its crater. The Hawaiian islands were created thousands of years ago by the eruptions of volcanoes, and now, Kilauea's continuous eruption is adding new land, making Hawaii the only state whose land mass is actually increasing. Hawaii also contains the world's largest volcano, Mauna Loa, with an estimated volume of 18,000 cubic miles. Its last eruption was in 1984.

If measured from its base on the ocean floor, Mauna Kea (pictured)  is the world's tallest mountain: 33,476 feet.

Mt. Waialeale, on the island of Kauai, is the wettest spot on earth, getting an average of 397 inches of rain per year.



Okay, enough trivia. Let's move on to the laws. Actually, most of the Hawaiian laws I perused were quite sensible, and designed to protect the environment and wildlife. But I did manage to find a handful of head scratchers.

• Billboards are illegal. 
• Residents may be fined if they don't own a boat.
• It's against the law to place a coin in your ear. (So much for magic tricks.)
• It's also illegal to get a tattoo behind your ear or on your eyelids, unless a registered physician is present.
• Shooting galleries aren't allowed to offer liquor as a prize. (For fear the winner may return after drinking  the prize and want to do some more shooting.)
• It's illegal to kick a seeing eye dog. 
• It's against the law to use imitation milk in milkshakes without warning. (Now, I LIKE this one!)
• It's illegal to feed a shark. (Even if he's a pet?)
• It's against the law to own a mongoose.
• It's illegal to fish with dynamite, electric current, or poison,
• In Honolulu, it's illegal to sing loudly outside after sunset. (Better watch how much you drink at that luau!)
• Also in Honolulu, it's illegal to annoy any bird within the limits of any public park. (So give him your sandwich, already!)
• In Maui county, anyone building an atomic bomb is subject to a fine. (That's ALL? Just a fine??)
• In Kauai, no buildings may be taller than the palm trees.

Okay, boys and girls. It's time for (ta-DA!)

The Weirdest News Stories of the Week

*** Rats are always getting a bad rap, but they could turn out to be man's best friends, especially if that man has had a stroke. Tel Aviv scientists have successfully restored lost brain functions in our furry little friends by turning them into Cyborgs. Kinda. A digital cerebellum, essentially a simple microchip attached to the brain with electrodes, can receive and interpret sensory input from the brain stem, and then relays the signal to another  portion of the brain to initiate the appropriate response. Thus far, the synthetic cerebellum can only deal with the most basic stimulus-response signals, but this marks a huge leap in the quest to repair certain brain malfunctions in humans. Earlier this year, researchers were able to restore previously lost memories in rats with the use of electrodes and chemicals. So the next time you see a rat, before you snap his neck in a trap, you might wanta thank him for his kind's service to mankind.

*** I've heard some amateur radio operators joke on the air that they were operating mobile ... because they were riding the couch. Well, as it turns out, some folks really DO ride their couches. A leather 2-seater broke a speed record in Sydney, Australia, earlier this week when it traveled at an amazing 101 MPH. Betcha didn't even know there was such a thing as a land speed record for upholstered household furniture, didja? Yup, the previous record of 91 MPH was set in 2008 by Brit Marek Turowsk. Evolution Motorsport, a race car and bike designer based in Sydney, built the new record-breaking racing couch, which was powered by a Suzuki GSX 1400 engine, and these guys weren't satsified with merely tearing up the macadam with the sofa alone, either. Oh no, it was attached to a coffee table, complete with a bowl of fruit and a cup of coffee. (What? No flowers?) If you'd like to take a peek at this speedy sofa in action, take a gander here

*** In past weeks, we've seen a would-be robber dressed as Gumby, and another with a fearsome firecracker stuffed down his britches. This week, we have a South Carolina man who successfully stole two cases of beer by threatening his victims with an inhaler, which allegedly resembled a silver pistol. The police didn't have any trouble finding the asthmatic crook. They simply followed the trail of empty beer cans. Evidently, inhaler plus multiple beers doesn't make for a very good equation. When police caught up with the twenty-three-year old, he finally used his head. Unfortunately, he used it to crush the police car windshield. Man, I'll bet that dude really had a hangover and a half.

*** This week was Banned Book Week, so how deliciously appropriate that a book previously banned in Boston actually became UN-banned. Actually, Mark Twain's book Eve's Diary was banned by the Charlton Public Library in Cambridge. Since 1906, this book was taboo because of some nude illustrations of Eve. This week, library trustees located two paperback copies of the book, and within two hours of shelving them, one was already in a patron's hot little hands. When the library's trustees banned the book back in 1906, Twain said, Nobody attaches weight to the freaks of the Charleston Library." But apparently, they did. For more than a century.



                                       Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

ALOHA!

Banner Boners

Thought for the day:  I'd rather have a life full of mistakes than a heart full of regret. 

President-elect Truman

When I was a preschooler, my favorite joke asked, "What would you rather have chase you, an elephant or a gorilla?" And the answer, which tickled me down to my chubby little four-year-old toes, was, "I'd rather have the elephant chase the gorilla."

Yeah, I know, not very funny, but I still like that way of thinking. Yeah, sure  it's better to make mistakes than have regrets, but given my druthers, I'd rather bail out on both of those lousy options. I say, let the elephant chase the gorilla again.  He needs the exercise.

If the truth be known, everybody makes mistakes. Most of us have the good fortune of screwing up on a semi-private level, though, so few people ever find out about our grievous gaffes. Most of us don't, say, find our errors and lapses in judgement emblazoned across the headlines of a newspaper for all the world to see.

One of the biggest journalistic boners of all time happened on November 3, 1948, when the Chicago Daily Tribune declared Dewey the new president of the United States. Oopsie moment, big time.

The following headlines don't even come close to that level of journalistic screw-up, but I found them amusing, and hope they give y'all a few smiles, too.

                                                                                 
                                                                                  

                                                                                                                                                                                

                                                                                 

                                                                               

                                                                                  

                                                                             

                                                                                 

Well, that's all I got for today. But then again, some days, a smile is more than enough.

Hmmm, I think I'll go find myself a gorilla to chase. (I could use the exercise, too.)

Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

                                                                                

Whole Lotta Linking Going On

Thought for the day:  Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing better than to put it into your fruit salad.

Well, how's about that? The high-spirited Dianne, who appropriately enough writes the blog In High Spirits, shared another award with me, and this one is all about superlatives. The 7 X 7 award requires a blogger to slog through previous posts and then provide an oh-so-helpful link to the ones deemed worthy of some superlative label or another. Alas, there are some grievous omissions. No category for most likely to make you snort a beverage out your nose, and nothing for post with the most references to smelly body functions. Ditto nothing for most inspirational, informative, or inane, so I really had to dig to find something even vaguely up to snuff for the lofty designations which are included.

Once I provide the links for my seven most hunky dory posts, I have the honor of sending seven other bloggers searching through their archives to tag seven of their best posts. And then they pass the award to seven others. And so on.

Easy, right? Kinda. I've only been blogging since the tail end of February, so my archives are a lot slimmer than some of yours. Still, it took some time to read through my slim pickings and make the decisions. But it was fun, and I think this is a great way to direct newer followers to some of that (ahem) superlative stuff that happened before they got here.

Hmm, okay, the first category is Most Beautiful.

But beauty's in the eyes of the beholder, right?

• Most Beautiful-  With a Little Help From a Friend is about volunteering at a soup kitchen. I don't know that it's exactly beautiful, but the reaction to it was. Oh yeah, you want a link, huh?
• Most Popular- According to the stats, On Doggies and Doggles received the most hits, by far. It's about Military Working Dogs. link
• Most Controversial- My stuff doesn't generate much in the way of controversy, but American History and an Unlikely Hero came the closest. It's about today's educational system. link
• Most Helpful- Well, gee, aren't I always helpful? I mean, where else can you learn about the saga of Jimmy Carter and the killer rabbit, about JFK and the jelly doughnut , or about Wrong Way Corrigan? (Not to mention disgusting foods, jobs, beauty products and book titles?) Seriously, I suppose the post Understanding Autism: A Long Way to Go was the most helpful in that it raised awareness of this heartbreaking condition. link
• Most Surprisingly Successful- Rhymes with Dreams got a lot of hits, too, if you trust the stats counter. It's kind of a mixed bag post, where I answer questions for another award, relate a story about my immigrant grandparents, and talk about memes. link
• Most Underrated- When our blogs first launch, we all write posts that end up with a grand total of zero comments. Maybe even zero reads. One of my early languishers was Luck o' the Irish. What makes it special is a recipe for corning your own beef. Not hard to do, but definitely worth the effort. link
• Most Pride Worthy- This is another tough one, but I'll pick Remembrance, which is about the meaning of Memorial Day. link

So, there ya have it. If, perchance, any of you do take the time to venture back to any of those earlier posts, please make any comments you'd like to make about them on THIS post, rather than on the earlier one.

The next order of business is to pass this superlative award on to seven superlative bloggers. Natch, if you don't give a diddle about seizing  this golden opportunity to entice your followers to read some of your earlier gems, fuhgetaboutit. No hard feelings. In no particular order, I tag

• Murrmurrs. I just discovered Murr at the beginning of September, but am already a big fan of her blog. And obviously, a big lazy fan. It'd be a real time-saver for me if she earmarks some of her earlier posts.
• Visiting Reality. I love this lady's special brand of reality, and although I've already read every one of her posts, maybe you haven't. Linda has a most delightful no-holds-barred sense of humor and a razor-sharp wit.
• Empty Nest Insider. Julie has a quiet, thoughtful approach, and the most disarming way of looking at things. Her insights are both charming and amusing.
• Starting Over, Accepting Changes- Maybe. Arleen always comes up with enjoyable posts and comments. Lots of reminiscing, and lots of quiet humor. Smart lady.  
• The Feathered Nest. Delores is the most prolific writer of all. She maintains three blogs, and they're all terrific. No telling what she might write about, but it's always good.
• Going Gently. John  lives in a small village in Wales and writes about village life, his menagerie of critters, his work as a nurse, and life in general. Always worth a read.
• The Scottish Scribbler. And last, but certainly not least, is Rory, who writes about everyday things both profound and hilarious. He has a unique outlook on life, and the ability to touch your heart with his words. And with his music.

It's inevitable that not all of those seven people will choose to follow through on this award, and that's okay. If anyone else would like to claim it, go for it. It's a great opportunity to shine light on some of  your older posts. Take a snapshot of it, so to speak.

                                       Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

Keep the Fork Away from that Chicken!

Thought for the day:  Know what the difference is between a bad Georgia golfer and a bad Georgia skydiver? The bad golfer says, "Whack. Dang!" and the bad skydiver goes, "Dang! Whack."

 I didn't realize how much I love our adopted state of Georgia until I started doing research for this post. You know how it is when people you really like come to visit you, and you find yourself trotting out all kinds of neat stuff to show them? (No? Okay, hush. Humor me.) That's how I feel about wanting to show and tell you guys so many neat things about this state.

I mean, yeah, we DO have the famous Big Chicken, a Marietta landmark, and that may seem a little gauche to some of you. But we look at it as a big ol' lovable funky red-and-white piece of folk art. Comes in verrrrry handy when you're giving directions around that part of town, too. Turn at the big chicken, or Two blocks past the Big Chicken. That's all you've gotta say.

But we also have sites of incredible beauty and historical significance.  Let me show you some of them:

These fountains at Centennial Park in downtown Atlanta are a legacy of the 1996 Summer Olympics.

The Georgia Aquarium, also in Atlanta, is the largest in the world. Shown here is one of the whale sharks, the largest fish in the world.

Stone Mountain is one of the largest exposed pieces of granite in the world, and the carving on it is allegedly the largest. Shown are (Confederate President) Jefferson Davis, Stonewall Jackson, and Robert E. Lee.

The North Georgia mountains are breathtaking. I especially love being there in the early morning when the mist is rising from the valley. Lots of great views, especially in the fall.

Lots of great white water rafting areas to be found, too. (And as far as I know, nobody will REALLY make you squeal lak a pig.)

 FDR's Little White House, located in Warm Springs.

Okefenokee Swamp. Lots of alligators and other wildlife here, but one of the neatest things is demonstrated in this picture. Because of the extreme stillness of the water and the high amount of tannic acid in it,  the water is incredibly reflective. Like a mirror.

Providence Canyon, located near Albany, and also known as the "Little Grand Canyon." It is quite beautiful and alive with colors, but the last time we visited, kudzu was threatening to ruin the aesthetics.

This is a picture taken in Savannah. Love, love, LOVE the majestic trees dripping with Spanish moss that are found all over South Georgia. By the way, in 2002, the American Institute of Parapsychology named Savannah  American's most haunted city.

This is Tybee Island, one of my favorite places in the state. My hubby and I were part of the team of amateur radio operators who put that lighthouse on the air for the first time. Did it a few more years after that, too. But I gotta tell ya, it's doggone HOT in South Georgia in August. Guess that's why the local operators never put the lighthouse on the air before. Took a bunch of fools from Atlanta to go down and do it. But it was F-U-N. After the first year, the lighthouse people even let us string an antenna from the top of the lighthouse.

I saved the strangest for last. These are the Georgia Guidestones, located in Elberton, and AKA the "American Stonehenge." These four massive blocks of granite contain ten guides, or commandments, carved in eight different languages. Lots of secrecy surrounding them. I'll tell you more about them in a later post.




See, that's some pretty cool stuff, huh? And that's just a tip of the proverbial iceberg. But that's enough. How about a short poem, and then we'll take a look-see at some of our laws. Believe me, we have some real lulus.

A South Georgia Blessing  (anonymous)
Bless this house, oh Lord we cry.
Please keep it cool in mid-July.
Bless the walls where termites dine,
While ants and roaches march in time.
Bless our yard where spiders pass
Fire ants' castles in the grass.
Bless the garage, a home to please
Carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.
Bless the love bugs, two by two,
The gnats and mosquitoes that feed on you.
Millions of creatures that fly or crawl,
In South Georgia, Lord,
You've put them all.
But this is home, and here we'll stay,
So, thank you, Lord, for insect spray!
*****

Okay, yeah, so we have a few bugs. And snakes. And in some areas, alligators. But it's a great place to live. (As long as the air conditioner doesn't go on the fritz.)

Now, about those laws:

• It's illegal to use profanity in front of a dead body while it's lying in a funeral home or coroner's office.
• Members of the state assembly can't be ticketed for speeding while the state assembly is in session.
• It's illegal to keep your donkey in a bathtub. (So get yer ass out!)
• No one may carry an ice cream in their back pocket on a Sunday. (How's about a sundae?)
• In Acworth, all citizens must own a rake. (Don't have to USE 'em, just have to own 'em.)
• In Athens-Clarke county, home of the University of Georgia, goldfish may not be given away to entice someone to play bingo.
• And it's illegal to make a "disturbing sound" at a fair. (Better skip those corn dogs!)
• And, no loud whistling allowed after 11 PM on a Monday. 
• In Atlanta, it's against the law to tie your giraffe to a telephone pole of street lamp. (Better hitch him to a parking meter.)
• In Columbus: it's illegal to carve your initials in a tree, even if that tree is on your own property.
• And it's against the law to cuss on the telephone.
•  Or to tease an idiot.
• But it's legal to burn a cross on someone else's property, as long as you have their permission.
• No picnics are allowed in graveyards, and it's illegal to bury someone under a cemetery sidewalk.
• Believe it or not, the fine for waving a gun in public is higher than the fine for shooting it.
• And the last one for Columbus: on Sundays, it's illegal to cut off a chicken's head, or to carry a chicken down Broadway by its feet.
• In Conyers, it's against the law to place a dead bird on a neighbor's lawn.
• In Dublin, it's illegal to throw rocks at birds, or to play catch in any city street. (No curb ball, huh?)
• In Gainesville, the Poultry Capital of the World, it's against the law to eat chicken with a fork. (By golly, if God wanted us to use a fork, he wouldn't have given us fingers!) 
• In Jonesboro, it's illegal to say, "Oh, boy!"
• In Kennesaw, all heads of households must own a gun and ammunition. (Enacted in 1981, and amended two years later to exempt conscientious objectors and those deemed incapable of using a firearm.)
• In Marietta, it's against the law to spit from a car or bus . . . however, it's okay to do so from a truck.
• And finally, in Quitman, it's illegal for a chicken to cross the road. (I wonder if it's okay to carry him across by his feet?)

There's actually an interesting explanation for the Jonesboro law. Following the Civil War, or War of Yankee Aggression, as it's known in these parts, many freed slaves settled in Jonesboro. When wealthy white men came into the area to hire day laborers, the former (and impoverished) slaves fought over these jobs, and often ended up with serious, and even fatal, injuries. How did those wealthy white men seek workers? You guessed it. They yelled, "Oh, boy!" By forbidding the use of these words, the law was intended to protect those freed slaves from injury.

Okay, boys and girls, it's that time again. Time to take a gander at (ta-DA!)

The Weirdest News Stories of the Week

*** Wisdom doesn't always arrive hand-in-hand with age. Alas, some people just get old. A sixty-something Florida man stuck a firecracker into the waistband of his shorts, walked into a Bed, Bath, and Beyond store, and tried to rob the place by showing his fearsome "weapon" and threatening to "blow everything up." Not sure if the cashier laughed at the guy or simply told him to get lost, but a customer followed the clueless would-be Geriatric Kid outside, and alerted police as to the make and model of the getaway car. The hapless crook was quickly apprehended. Oh well. At least he wasn't wearing a Gumby outfit. (Who knows? Maybe the guy was in dire need of a new shower curtain.)

*** Then, there's the West Virginia woman, who has neither age nor wisdom going for her. The twenty-three-year-old successfully stole a vehicle, but not just any vehicle. Not a flashy red Morgan. Not a Ferrari, or a Corvette, or even a lose-it-in-the-crowd run-of-the-mill Toyota. Oh, no. This chick stole a hearse. Complete with its very own dead body in back. Didn't take off across state lines with it, either. She simply drove that puppy home, where police found it a scant two hours later. Weird, huh? I dunno. Maybe her roommate asked her to go out and get him a "cold one?" (Sorry. I couldn't resist.)

*** Yummy, and liberal-leaning, ice cream maker Ben & Jerry's is in the cross hairs again. The ultra-conservative group One Million Moms, which has gone ballistic over some of the company's flavor name choices in the past, is up in arms once again. The latest name to draw their ire? Schweddy Balls. This admittedly unusual flavor name is a nod to a classic Saturday Night Live NPR spoof, in which Alec Baldwin plays character Pete Schweddy. If you've never seen it before, you've gotta check it out. CAVEAT: Best not to attempt to drink anything while watching this. By the way, this flavor is only supposed to be available for a limited time, so if you have a hankering to try it, don't waste any time. Sounds pretty good: vanilla with rum flavoring, and milk chocolate and malt-filled chocolate balls. (Nary a hair!)


Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

Yeeeee HAW!

Thought for the day:  If you've ever raced a monster truck through knee-high mud, you might be a redneck.

Since this Friday's post will be highlighting my adopted state of Georgia, today seems like an appropriate time to write about the Redneck Olympics.


Back in 1996, when the REAL Summer Olympics were held here in Atlanta, there was a teensy bit of disparaging chatter about holding the Olympics in (look down your nose when you say it) redneck territory. So a bunch of good-natured Georgians grabbed hold of that idea with both fists, and held the first Redneck Olympics that same year. Nothing but a raucous down-home good time, it was established as an innovative and fun way to raise money for charity. Touted on their website as more fun than indoor plumbing, it also boasts Everybody and their butt crack is welcome --- even Yankees. Was it a success? You betcha, and it continues to be. Not only has the little town of East Dublin, Georgia raised scads of money every year since, but the Redneck Games are now held in quite a few other decidedly NOT redneck areas ... by (gasp) Yankees, and even as far north as Canada.

So, what kinds of competition would you find at the Redneck Olympics, you ask? Certainly no water polo or fencing, but you WILL find some of these thing:

• Hillbilly horseshoes- kinda like the usual kind of horseshoes, only with toilet seats
• Hubcap hurl
• Armpit serenade
• Watermelon seed spitting
• Mud pit belly flop
• Beer-swilling 
• Wife-carrying
• Lawnmower racing
• Bobbing for pigs feet
• Pie-eating

Sounds like fun, huh? To further traumatize you reinforce your understanding of these games, how about some pictures?

Bobbing for pigs feet

Almost got one!

Got it!

gonna be a good un!

um, no caption needed

His mama's so proud!

He's playing our song.

Double header!

um, good clean fun, right?

Another armpit serenader

Not as easy as it looks, I'll betcha.

Nobody can say rednecks don't know how to have FUN. And they aren't nearly as uncouth as some people seem to think they are, either. After all, they don't have any belching or pull-my-finger contests, now, do they?

What competition would YOU like to watch . . .  or better yet . . .  BE in?

Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.