With a Horn and a Gun

Thought for the day:  Jokes about German sausage are the absolute wurst.

Okay, so this post isn't about German sausage, but it IS about kielbasa... Polish sausage. How'd ya like to learn how to make it?

And as a bonus, you can also see how my old-fashioned vs. new-fangled competition went.

 That chunk of cow horn is what I've used to stuff sausage casings for more than forty years. We'll call it Davey, okay? And the modern sausage-making tool, a nifty gift from my brother, is our Goliath. This was my first time using it.

Just for kicks, I decided to use Davey to make the first ring of sausage, and Goliath for the other, and compare the times. Yeah, I know. Kinda like comparing a modern text messenger with an old guy sending Morse code, right?

Still, let's see how it went, shall we?

First, to make any sausage, you need ground meat. For kielbasa, I use pork butt, and have the butcher grind it for me, including all its fat. To make good juicy sausage, you MUST have some fat. Pork is so much leaner than it used to be, some people add additional ground fat to their sausage. Not my choice to do that, though. Just try to find meats with some marbling and fat around the edges, and you'll be fine, as long as you don't overcook it.

These are the four simple ingredients I use. Of the four, I consider marjoram to be the most important. If you make kielbasa, don't use a dusty ol' bottle of marjoram that's been sitting on your pantry shelf for God only knows how long, okay? Spring for a fresh bottle. You'll notice the salt, pepper and garlic are all coarse ground.

You need to add enough spices to your sausage to be able to see them. I don't follow a recipe, and judge when it's just right by the smell and look of the meat. The latest batch I made was about three and a half pounds of meat, and I used about half a bottle of marjoram, maybe a tablespoon or so of garlic powder and pepper, and about a teaspoon of salt. (Sorry I can't be more specific. I don't measure.) When the mixture looks and smells good, you can pinch off a small patty's worth and fry it for a quick taste test.

A squirt of Pam makes it easier to slip the casing onto the horn. Tie a knot in the end, and start pushing the meat through the horn with your fingers and into the casing. Keep a straight pin handy so you can prick the casing if an air pocket develops. As for the casing, it's fairly easy to find in some parts of the country, but not so much in others. Here, I can get it fresh at Whole Foods. You may even be able to order it online.

The first ring, made with Davey, is almost finished here. Total time from first bit of meat shoved through the horn to the second end tie-off? Fifteen minutes. Not too shabby, huh?

Time to try the big gun. It comes with several different sizes of tubes, but this one looked about right, so I gave it a shot of Pam and pushed the casing on, easy-peasy, slick as all get-out. Time to check the clock...

Here's the gun, fully loaded with meat and ready to shoot. Doesn't it look cool?

Unfortunately, I encountered a few (ahem) ESO (Equipment Superior to Operator) problems. Those black screw-on caps at either end of the tube LOOK the same, don't they? I thought so, too. But the threading isn't the same. After I loaded the tube with meat the first time, I couldn't screw the darned thing onto the gun. Once it was switched, reloaded, casing reattached, and then hooked up correctly, squeezing the trigger emptied the tube and shot the meat into the casing lightning fast. Too fast. (Okay, so maybe I was blasting it like Al Capone with a tommy gun...) The Pam I'd stupidly put on the nozzle didn't help, either. The casing flew off the nozzle so fast, the meat packed way too loosely amid a ton of monster air pockets. So, after I used a wooden spoon handle to push the last bits of meat out of the nozzle, I had to manually squeeze the meat through the casing and eliminate all the air pockets. Bottom line: with all my screw-ups, it was well over thirty minutes before I tied the final knot in the second ring of sausage.

So, Davey beat Goliath. This time. Kinda. Next time, the gun will definitely blast my handy dandy horn outta the water. If I hadn't been so darned trigger-happy and charmed by the gun's speed this time, I could've ... I should've... been controlling the packing and air pockets as I went along.

Bottom line? It doesn't matter how ya fill the casing. (My mother-in-law had a sausage attachment on her electric mixer.) This stuff is DEE-licious. Simple to prepare, too. Barely cover it with water, bring to a slow boil, and then simmer for fifteen to twenty minutes. Drain most of the water, and add sauerkraut. Cook until heated through. Serve with mashed potatoes. And there ya have it... Polish comfort food at its finest. And if you don't want to stuff your meat into casings at all, you could always make some unique-tasting burgers.

                     I'd show you what it looked like after it was cooked... but we (erp!) ate it.

(Oh yeah, just so ya know, a pair of old-timer Morse code operators DID beat a pair of hot shot text messengers on the Jay Leno show a couple years ago... )

                                      So, what's YOUR favorite comfort food?

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four unless there are three other people.  [Orson Welles}

My mom made two dishes: Take it or Leave it.  [Stephen Wright]

                          Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

Come Take a Peek

Thought for the day:  I think I did pretty well, considering I started with a bunch of blank paper. [Steve Martin]

Every book, no matter how big or small, starts with a ream of blank paper or an empty computer screen. (With an annoying cursor nagging us to write something.) Transforming that blank paper or empty screen into a book is a monumental accomplishment.

To do it more than once? Better yet!

Well, the lovely Carol Kilgore has done it again! And it's a pleasure to slap on some perfume and participate in her tantalizing peep show today. We're gonna wiggle our hips, and strip off the sexy veil...  to (ta-DA!) reveal her cover and blurb in all its glory, and whet your appetite before her buxom book makes a sinewy splash this spring. (Okay, so it isn't buxom... or sinewy... but gimme a break, okay? I was on a roll.)

Anyhow, cue up the appropriate music, and take a good gander at her latest book cover. Isn't it gorgeous? While Carol's had numerous stories published in magazines, I've only had the privilege of reading her first novel, In Name Only, and its short story prequel, Never Say My Name. Thoroughly enjoyed both of them, too. I guess her work could be described as suspense... as mystery... or as romance, but I like her description the best: crime fiction with a kiss.

And, oh, boy, I really like the description of this book, too:

US Coast Guard Commander Taylor Campbell is back in Rock Harbor, Texas, on a quest to unearth her uncle's treasure—a journey far outside the realm of her real life. There’s one glitch. Taylor is certain the buried treasure was all in Uncle Randy's dementia-riddled mind. Now he’s dead.

Former SEAL Jake Solomon is in Rock Harbor under false pretenses to protect Taylor from the fate that befell her uncle and the other members of a tight circle of Coast Guardsmen called the Compass Points who served together on Point boats in Vietnam.

Jake is definitely not supposed to become involved with Taylor. That was his first mistake. Taylor is attracted to Jake as well, but she refuses to wait for him to locate the killer when she knows her plan will force her uncle’s murderer into action.

But the killer's actions are just what Jake is afraid of.

+++

I mean, yum, right? A hunky SEAL... a determined woman with a mission... buried treasure... murder and danger... and somewhere along the line, I suspect there will be at least one ... kiss. I can't wait to read this one. How about you? Tempted...?

Carol Kilgore has always had stories and characters in her head, but she didn’t know she should write them down until about a dozen years ago. Once she started, she couldn’t stop.

Her first published short story won the Derringer Award for Best Short-Short Mystery. She continued to write short fiction for a few years and also enjoyed a small success as a freelancer before giving it all up for her true love—novels.

Carol writes a blend of mystery, suspense, and romance she calls Crime Fiction with a Kiss. (Told ya!) Always at least one crime; always a love story. Solomon’s Compass is her second published novel.

As the wife of a Coast Guard officer, Carol has lived in locations across the U.S. She and her husband now live in a San Antonio suburb and share their home and patio with two active herding dogs that keep them free from all danger, real or imagined.

You can find Carol here:

website . blog . facebook . twitter . goodreads . amazon 

                                    Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

Salami in the Slammer

Thought for the day:  An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in; a pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.  [Bill Vaughn]

Happy New Year, y'all. As Oprah Winfrey said, Cheers to a new year and another chance to get it right.

A fresh start. Don't you like the sound of that? Not that I was bored with the old year, mind you, but isn't it exciting to embark on a new one, and to anticipate what may lie ahead? May this be the year we all get it right.

In the new year, may your right hand be stretched out in friendship, but never in want.

So, did you go out dancing, and wining & dining to welcome the new year? Eat breakfast at a crummy restaurant on the way home?

Did you go to a party... or host one... where a guest demonstrated a skill he mastered in college?

Peach drop- Atlanta

Did you spend the evening shivering with a huge crowd of people... partying, singing, and waiting... and then counting down while some object descended to mark another year's demise?

Me, neither.











Oh, we've done a lot of those things over the years, and hosted some pretty terrific parties, too, but now, we generally go out for an early dinner, and then spend a relaxing evening at home by ourselves. (This year, better yet! We steamed crabs.) Like a couple of old farts, we grumble about some of the so-called music they play on the TV celebrations, and then as the bewitching hour approaches, my hubby pops a bottle of champagne. It may not be earth-shattering, but it suits us.

Of all the New Year's Eves Smarticus and I have spent together, one stands out above all the rest, because it was so unique. You see, it was the one and only time we spent the night at ... the local jailhouse.




HA! Didn't know I was such a bad girl, didja?

Remember the Y2K scare? Even though there was a mad scramble, and a ton of cash spent during the nineties to fix a computer glitch that could've crashed computer systems all over the world, a lot of uncertainty remained as January 1, 2000 approached. And not just about the computer glitch. Emergency management personnel had other concerns, as well.

Enter amateur radio. At the request of government officials, amateur radio operators set up stations in every police station, fire house, hospital, public utility, and numerous other places I can't recall right off hand... just in case.

My hubby and I set up at the police station just inside those doors and to the right. We maintained communications with the other emergency stations around our county and state. We checked in with other operators set up in similar situations in other states... and in other countries.

The police couldn't have been nicer. They had a great spread of food set up to celebrate the holiday, and told us to help ourselves. The mayor stopped by and chatted with us. We had a blast.

We stayed until about 4AM, because by then, everyone was fairly sure all was well. Still, it was pretty cool. And like I said, unique. I'm sure others have spent New Year's Eve in jail before... but with a slightly different connotation. (And they probably didn't get any cookies, either.)

                                 What's the strangest place YOU ever spent New Year's Eve?


Now is the time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving the road to hell with them as usual.  [Mark Twain]

By the way, I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. We sure did. Here's a handful of pictures...

L to R: Aaron, Kymber, Devyn, and Jaiden

Nothing puts the magic into Christmas better than sharing it with family and friends... especially if children are involved. We had the pleasure of staying with our son and his family. Can you believe the kids actually posed for pictures before opening a single present?

Princess Kymber

The boys each got a Superman towel/robe thingie; Kymber got one of Ariel; and Devyn got Minnie Mouse. She isn't usually one to smile for a picture, but she reeeeeally loved her Minnie Mouse get-up.

With a little help from big brother Jaiden and a LOT of help from mom Tina, Kymber made a batch of itty bitty cupcakes in her new Easy Bake oven.

The three older kids got kid-friendly tablets from their other grandfather. I can't believe how quickly they picked those things up and started playing on them, as though it were intuitive. Aaron is only two years old, and he was navigating on that thing better than I was. ('Course, I realize that ain't saying much...)



Okay, enough. Christmas is over for another year, a whole new year stretches ahead of us, and... life is good.

Oh, by the way, for those of you who remember when the kids got rabbits last year, what can I say? All of a sudden, the little critters have been multiplying like... rabbits! Two babies were born a week before we got there, and four more were born two days before. After the first two were born, Tina took the older rabbits to the vet. All girls except for one very enthusiastic little guy, who got neutered. Too late! I'm telling ya, he was a really busy bunny! A couple days ago, seven more babies. Ah well, time to enlarge the habitat again...

                                Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.