Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Sum Tink Wong

Thought for the day:  Man who stand on toilet high on pot.

Have you ever noticed how twisted up translations can become from one language to another? Sometimes, they're pretty frustrating, but they can also be inadvertently funny. Manuals for electronic gadgets can make you want to pull your hair out when the manufacturer's primary language is Japanese. And my hubby bought a box of drill bits, (made in China) only to come home and notice the box declared them to be "dill bits." We thought that was so funny, we kept the box around for a while just to show our friends.

BUT ... wouldn't you think if someone wanted to open a restaurant, a place for American people to come and EAT,  they'd check, check and DOUBLE-check how the name they've selected for that restaurant might translate before hanging their sign out front? I sincerely doubt if any of the following owners gave it a second thought:

What? You say, for some strange reason, you've decided to eat at HOME tonight?

And you have the oddest craving for Chinese food? How about this simple recipe for fried rice:

Surely you have some leftover cold rice in your fridge, right? No? Well, then you'll have to cook some, and stick it in the fridge to let it chill for a while. While it's cooling, you can chop some green onions, and gather whatever veggies and/or meat you want to add to your creation. For four cups of rice, you'll want about a cup of veggie/meat combo. Or more, if you'd like. (It's YOUR dinner.) Shrimp is good, leftover pork, beef, peas, carrots, whatever you happen to have on hand. OK, now beat two eggs and stir fry in 2 T oil (peanut, lard, sesame, or whatever your little heart desires) until the eggs are dry and separated into small pieces. Remove the eggs, put 3 more T oil into the pan, and toss in your veggies, meat and rice. Stir fry for ~5 minutes or so. Add 2 T chicken broth, 3 T soy sauce. Mix well, and then stir in your eggs, 1/2 t pepper and 2 t sesame oil. Voila! Your masterpiece!

Don't feel like rice? How about this? If you're feeling a little creative, these chicken wings are guaranteed to put a smile on your face:

Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.


  1. Those are saucy wings.

  2. It is nice to see that there is some truth in advertising. At least I would be forewarned if I entered Soon Fatt Takaway.

    Chewy Balls has me intrigued, I would just have to try that out.

  3. Oh, my god -- the legs on those wings! Not to mention a few other parts!

    The restaurants made me laugh out loud, as usual for one of your posts. I kind of think one or two of them was intentional, but as for the others -- wth???

  4. Ha-ha-ha! Those "legs"!

    And I'm giggling hysterically over the names of those restaurants. Reminds of the restaurant we'd see whenever we visited our daughter at college. It proudly proclaimed "Chinese food coming up soon!" Um, yeah. We were never inclined to eat there. ;)

  5. When we lived in Fredericksburg, VA we had to pass a restaurant named "The Fuken Gourmet" when we drove downtown. We giggled like 12 year olds each time.
    Your rice sounds delicious.

  6. Hahahahahahah!!!! Nasty Chinese Restaurant! Thanks Susan!

  7. Hi, All. Thanks so much for your comments.

    Delores- Try 'em on your husband some time. Guaranteed to get a reaction!

    Starting Over- The Soon Fatt one is probably my favorite. Reminds me of a stand-up comic who makes fun of the overeater at a Chinese buffer restaurant. ("Go home! You too fat! Eat more veg-ables!")

    Dianne- Saucy wings like that can put a little spice in life.

    Linda- HA! That's a good one. Coming up soon ... er, no thanks.

    Musical Gardener- You're welcome, dear sir.

    Skippy- I would giggle, too. Every. Single. Time.

    Austan- You're welcome. Good to make you laugh.

  8. "Hung Far Low"?! I don't believe that name was an accident! But "Bung Hole"?! That has to be the very worst restaurant name. Ever!

  9. A fine selection! Like SO, I would HAVE to eat at Chewy Balls.

  10. Yep, I gotta get me some of those Chewy Balls. And perhaps a spot of Happy Crack. You take the cake, Susan. Two Chinese take-out places that always cracked me up, one in Toronto I would pass on the streetcar called 'Hung Lo' and one in London (Ontario that is) I would drive past called 'Fu Kee'. Bung Hole... 6 o'clock!

  11. titter
    loved the chewy balls!
    surprise surprise

  12. Look at y'all. Sounds like "Chewy Balls" is the crowd favorite! Hmmm, I wonder what they serve? Mountain oysters, maybe?

    Take care.

  13. funny as always!
    Where do you find all this stuff.

  14. Do you get any rest at all? Your posts always wear me out from laughing so hard! BTW, I have an award for you! Julie

  15. Hi, Al. I tend to find humor everywhere, so once a silly thought comes into my head, I start looking for stuff to illustrate it. That, and a couple email buddies send me cool pics from time to time, too, that stimulate the mental juices.

    Hi, Julie. Laughing is good! (Most of the time, that's the only exercise I get!) Thanks for the award, dear lady. I'll go check it out. Take care.