Kicking a Few Things Around

Thought for the day:  In football, everything is complicated by the presence of the opposite team.  [Jean-Paul Sartre]

Okay, so granted, Sartre was probably talking about that other kind of football, the one we Americans call soccer, but it's still a nifty quote. And although soccer is a nifty game, we're not gonna talk about it today. Nope, we're gonna kick around some stuff about American football.

You a football fan? We're rabid avid Falcons fans. Our kids and grandkids, too. See? Even though they live in Florida, our younger son and his baby boy were all decked out in style to watch the Falcons play this past Sunday. (Too bad da Birds didn't win. Wait 'til next week, though!)


RAH! RAH! Now that football season has started, I figured I'd blatantly seize the opportunity to explain a couple football happenings from my novel Hot Flashes and Cold Lemonade. (Aw, crap, she's talking about her damned book again.)

NO, no, now wait. Hold on. I'm not pimping my book. A couple readers questioned these two items is all, so I thought I'd remind y'all that I wrote a book address them here. You might even find it interesting.

Characters MaryBeth and Willie go to a Washington Redskins game, and a reader from Baltimore wanted to know why the heck they didn't go to a Baltimore Ravens game, fuh cryin' out loud.

Well, Baltimore's in love with the Ravens now, but that wasn't always the case. Its first love was the Colts, who played there from 1953 until 1983, when they slunk out of town under cover of darkness to move to Indianapolis. After that infamous departure, many locals threw their heart-broken support to the Redskins. Our story takes place in the late '90s, and although the Ravens started playing in Baltimore in '97, some fans were reticent about supporting the newbies, so they stuck with the Redskins for a while. Ergo, MaryBeth and Willie went to a Redskins game. (Plus, I had an ulterior motive for getting them on the Baltimore-Washington Parkway.)

Big Georgette and Boss Hog

Much to my surprise, the other question came from my very own Smarticus. He wanted to know what the deal was about them wearing pig snouts at the game. (Oh, like that's any dumber than fans wearing a big block of cheese on their heads?)

Anyhow, in the 1980s, the 'Skins offensive line was... how shall I put this... large. Very large, as in super-sized. Their coach Joe Bugel called them... the hogs. (Ah-HA!)

Yep, so beginning in 1983, twelve male 'Skins fans... dubbed the Hogettes...  started donning dresses and pig snouts to every game to cheer on their team. (They also raised a considerable amount of money for charity.)

When this iconic group retired in 2012, it had twelve active members and fifteen former ones. Three were inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame as part of the VISA Hall of Fans. (I'll betcha the hall has inducted at least one cheesehead, too.)

Bottom line? This group started wearing snouts in honor of the original hogs of the early '80s, and other fans quickly followed suit. ( No telling how many of the fans who wear them to games today know why they wear them, but now... you do.)

With a new season underway, football fans are... floating on air.

Hey! How's about some football funnies? Believe it or not, these are actual quotes:

• Joe Theisman- Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. (Um, yeah. Good ol'... Norman.)
• Torrin Polk- (talking about his coach) He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings. (Heck, why not? Joe Namath wore pantyhose.)
• George Rogers- I want to rush for 1000 or 1500 yards, whichever comes first. (I'm thinking this guy probably wasn't a math major.)
• Bill Peterson- (former Oilers coach) You guys line up alphabetically by height. Peterson also gets credit for this one: Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl. (Math wasn't his strong suit, either.)
• Dick Butkus- I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was important — like a league game. (Aren't all NFL games league games?)
• William Perry- I've been big ever since I was little. (And he was, too! AKA Refrigerator, Perry was 200 pounds at the age of eleven!)
• Jerry Rice- I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that. (No, of course not.)
• Thomas Henderson- (referring to Terry Bradshaw) He couldn't spell cat if you spotted him the C and the T. (Now that's just mean.)
• Joe Namath- I don't know if I prefer Astroturf to grass. I never smoked Astroturf. (He probably couldn't get it to light.)
• John Elway- I normally run the 40-yard dash in 4.9, but when a 280-pound guy is chasing me, I run it in 4.6. (Darned good incentive to step it up a bit, I'd say.)

*****

                                               Half-pint footballers pull off quite a trick:

                                    Here's a little something for you fans of that other football.

                                                                       ( Happy?)

                                    Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.

Football is like life— it requires perseverance, self-denial, hard work, sacrifice, dedication, and respect for authority.  [Vince Lombardi]

Football is the ballet of the masses.  [Dmitri Shostakovich]

I like football. I find it's an exciting strategic game. It's a great way to avoid conversation with your family on Thanksgiving.  [Craig Ferguson]