It Takes a Lot of Flapping to Fly

Thought for the day:  Do you think people who jump off bridges in Paris are in Seine?

Have you ever seen an albatross in flight? With their huge wingspans, ranging anywhere from six feet to an unsubstantiated report of more than seventeen feet, when these birds take to the air, their grace and maneuverability are unsurpassed.

But they do have a slight problem with take-offs and landings.

With a wingspan that can be as much as three times their body lengths, their attempts at getting off the ground and back again are awkward, clumsy, and when set to music, as Jack Paar did many years ago, hilarious. Also known as gooney birds because of their awkward antics, these guys run and run and run ... and run ...  with heads bobbing, big clown feet slapping and enormous wings flapping, until you're sure they'll never get off the ground. But after several up-a-little and then boom-back-to-the-ground false starts, with their big feet flopping and wings flapping the whole time, they finally achieve flight. And their landings? Let's just say they aren't so much landings as they are bouncing on their butt crashes.

Yesterday, I was a gooney bird.

As I told y'all on Monday, yesterday afternoon was my first writers' group meeting. Since I'm rather directionally challenged, my sweet hubby drove me to the meeting place on Sunday, in kind of a recon mission, so I could find my way there yesterday without burning a whole tank of  gas, and manage to make it back home in time to put his dinner on the table. (He's no fool.)

So yesterday, I got my favorite notebook and pen ready, and printed out some of my writing to share with the group. Decided to go with the prologue to my WIP, since no one had read it before, and I figured any input would be fresh, and hopefully, helpful. Took a shower. Put on shorts with an honest-to-God waist band and shoes that didn't go flop flop when I walked . Even swiped my lashes with mascara and put on a dab of lipstick.

I was excited.

Driving to the meeting, I wondered if the others would like me. Wondered if they'd like my writing. With hands sweating and heart pounding, I headed into the building, feeling like a kid on the first day in a new school.

Two hours later, I returned home. Since I'd told my hubby about some errands I planned to run after the meeting, he was surprised to see me so soon.

I announced, "Everybody at the meeting knew me!"

He was like, "Huh?"

"And," I continued, "they were all married to you!"

After another split second of "Huh?" on his face, he got it. Nobody else showed.

Crap. I'm not even a gooney bird. At least THEY eventually achieve lift-off. Me, I just flapped my wings and looked awkward.

I posted a comment on the community website about the writers' group meeting. Got three responses, all apologies, and one sweet comment about how she could "tell I was a writer" because my complaint was so funny. Today, the writers' group page is conspicuously absent from the webpage. So, I don't know if the group will ever be meeting again, or if it's kaput for good. (sigh)

You know, all writers are a bit like gooney birds. It takes a lot of running and flapping to get our careers off the ground. Even though we may make some false starts, we've got to keep on running, and got to keep on flapping if we want to succeed. After all, the flight is such a beautiful thing to behold, and well worth the effort. Heck,  I'm not even worried about crash landing. I've got plenty of padding.

Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.