Friday, November 17, 2017

They Are Our Son-Shines

Thought for the day:  Here's what I've learned about raising boys— if you keep 'em busy, they're fine. You let 'em get bored, they'll dismantle your house board by board. [Kenny Rogers]


[image courtesy of Morguefile]
Have you ever noticed how puppies... and little boys... play? Lots of similarities there. The exuberance... the horseplay... the unending energy... the smell. For sure, our sons loved to horse around like a couple of over-sized puppies when they were growing up. Matter of fact, even when they were well into their twenties, if the two of them were visiting at the same time, it was a pretty sure bet that they'd eventually end up rough-housing, which usually involved some loud bumping into and bouncing off the walls. Then when they got older, they traded in the rough-housing for arm-wrestling and competitive weight lifting, which even drew Smarticus into the fray. Must be a guy thing. My daughter and I would never compete like that... unless you count board games.


We've come a long way since I took this picture of Smarticus and the kids back in about 1980 or so. Now the boys have kids of their own, who undoubtedly do their fair share of bouncing off the walls. Especially the boys.

Because, as anyone can tell you who has raised both boys and girls, boys and girls behave very differently. (As if they really are from two different planets at times.) All blessings in their own right, but let's just say that boys can also be rip-roaring odoriferous rambunctious challenges. (And I wouldn't have it any other way!)

[image courtesy of Morguefile]

At some point, one of our sons went from enjoying bath time to expending entirely too much energy trying to weasel out of it. Once, he even went to the trouble of filling the tub without actually bothering to put so much as a toe into the water. He just hung out in the bathroom for a while... reading a book. Then after what he deemed to be an appropriate amount of time, he let the water out and emerged in his clean pajamas. If he hadn't been so darned dirty, he might've gotten away with it.

Why is it with boys, when you tell them to wash their hands, you have to specify that they should use soap? Never mind. Silly question. Our son didn't even think he needed water...

Anyhow, raising children can teach parents all kinds of lessons. Not always things we want to know, mind you, but lessons nonetheless. I'm pleased to say we didn't personally experience all of the things on the following list of things parents learn by raising boys:
  • A king-sized waterbed holds enough water to create a 4-inch deep flood in a 2000 square foot home.
  • If you spray hairspray on dust bunnies and then run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
  • A 3-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
  • If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor isn't strong enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing batman underoos and a superman cape.
  • However, it  is strong enough, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 room.
  • You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
  • When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
  • A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
  • The glass in windows (even double-paned) doesn't stop a baseball that's been hit by a ceiling fan.
  • When you hear a toilet flush and "uh-oh", it's already too late.
  • Brake fluid mixed with Chlorox makes smoke. A LOT of smoke.
  • A 6-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock, even though a 36-year-old man says it can only be done in the movies.
  • Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year-old boy.
  • Play dough and microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
  • Super glue is forever.
  • No matter how much Jello you put into a swimming pool, you still can't walk on water.
  • Pool filters do not like Jello.
  • VCRs do not eject PB&J sandwiches, even though TV commercials show that they do.
  • Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
  • Marbles in gas tanks make a lot of noise when driving.
  • You probably don't want to know what that smell is.
  • Always check the oven before turning it on; ovens do NOT like plastic toys.
  • The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
  • It will, however, make cats dizzy.
  • Cats throw up twice their weight when dizzy.

[image courtesy of Morgefile]
                             Until next time, take care of yourselves. And each other.



70 comments:

  1. I must admit I have played ball with the ceiling fan many times.

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  2. Yes, boys are definitely very different to little girls. I was a teacher for 35 long years, and this was always so noticeable. Fun post today, made me smile. Have a great weekend, hugs, Valerie

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    1. Thirty-five LONG years, huh? HA! Anyone who says little boys and little girls act exactly the same hasn't been paying attention. :)

      I'm glad the post made you smile. Have a super weekend!

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  3. As you know we'll be a year older in a month. You will embody everything nice, I'm sure. I however, like all boys turning 68, will still consist of frogs, snails and puppydog tails. Great post, Susan.

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    1. I've always been "one of the guys" in a lot of ways, so I'm sure my makeup contains some snippets of puppydog tails, too. :)

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  4. I don't recall either of my boys ever refusing a bath. Getting them OUT of the tub was my problem. And living in Australia, both of them spent a good part of their toddlerhood wearing nothing but undies. Come to think of it, the girls did that too until they were school age.

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    1. When they were very young, it was hard to pry their butts out of the bathtub, because they thought of it as play time. When they were teenagers, they had such a propensity for taking loooooong showers, we had to set a time limit. It was during the in-between years, when they were no longer interested in playing with tub toys and not yet interested in girls, that they developed a peculiar aversion to soap and water. :)

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  5. My three brothers are still (in their sixties and seventies) competitive. It is no longer physical but I suspect they all regret it. They smell better than they did too.
    Yet another post which left me smiling. Thanks Susan.

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    1. HA! My brother was here visiting us this week, and at seventy-five, he smells better than he used to, too. :) And he didn't bounce off a single wall.

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  6. “A king-sized waterbed holds enough water to create a 4-inch deep flood in a 2000 square foot home.”

    Hahahahahahah!

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  7. Wow - that is quite a list of "boy things" you've experienced. I'm surprised you all survived :-)

    I remember being told to wash my hands before dinner and just running the water without washing them.

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    1. Thank goodness, we didn't experience all of those "boy things" personally. :)

      It's "possible" I may have done something similar back in the Dark Ages...

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  8. Greetings Susan. An amusing post that I enjoyed reading. Sorry for all of your struggles bringing your boys up. My daughter was a 'tomboy', and acted up just as much as my son. But she matured quicker than him, and settled down in her teenage years. My son took a while to grow out of adolescence! Blessings to you.

    Thank you. Love love, Andrew. Bye.

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    1. Greetings, Andrew. Nope, they weren't struggles. I thoroughly enjoyed raising all of our children. (Having a good sense of humor was very helpful. HA!)

      Blessing back atcha.

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  9. You've brought a smile to my face, as usual. How well I remember my little daughter running to me to say that her big brother had clogged up the toilet and was going to flush it. I dashed up the stairs just in time to see the look of horror on his face as the water came gushing out. He also played ceiling fan games.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Glad I made ya smile. Boys DO like to challenge the "flushability" of things that were never intended to go into a toilet.

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  10. I have three daughters and one son. I love them all dearly. When they were growing up you could always tell if he was in the house because one (or all) of the girls was crying. Even today, as middle age grownups, he is not above needling them.

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    1. HA! Yep. Sounds about right. There's just something about that male DNA. :)

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  11. Like you, my boys now have children of their own. While I had 6 sons I was always thankful for at least 1 daughter. I was also thankful that I had 6 sons and only one girl. The may be rowdy, rough and tumble, but the are not half the drama. Oh my!

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    1. Good point. Daughters DO know how to act like little drama queens, don't they?

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  12. Too funny, think I'm glad I had a daughter.

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    1. I feel very lucky to have had both. No matter what kind of challenges they may have presented over the years, the true reward of old age is watching them struggle with their own kids. HA!

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  13. haha I may or may not have done some things with the ceiling fan and the washing machine. Even played in quick mud to see how far I could sink compared to the others lol oh well, keeps all on their toes.

    Thanks for the review too!

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    1. Oh, you naughty boy! (No... you "normal" boy!)

      You're very welcome. :)

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  14. for a long time there was a footprint on the ceiling in the kitchen. How did that occur? Boys wrestling and picking each other up - upside down. We lived with brown - brown sofas, brown carpet, etc forever. There was no point otherwise. Funny post

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    1. HA! Funny how that goes. We had a few footprints on our ceiling, too.

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  15. This excerpt from one of my posts just talks about one son. I won't even mention the other!!

    He deliberately rode his bike into a construction pit, jumped off the front porch (a one story fall) using an umbrella as a parachute, & wasn't too fond of bathing as a child. He once wrote his opinion of showering on the steamed up mirror. (He wrote "fucke" instead of "fuck"; it looked as if Shakespeare was swearing!!)

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    1. HA! Your son sounds like a very "typical" boy. Right down to the misspelling... HA!

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  16. I do so love this post. I raised (am raising) four boys. You probably won't be surprised, but we go through a lot of ceiling fans. What is the lure?

    A friend of mine raised boys. His sister raised girls. His sister was in visiting and the boys were out playing baseball in the yard. Eventually, a ball came through the window. My friend threw the ball back out the window and grabbed a broom. His sister, shocked, asked him if he was going to say something to the boys, so he yelled, "Good hit" out the window and then went about cleaning up the glass.

    Raising boys, damage happens. But boy is it a lot of fun.

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    1. HA! Yeah, I'm sure you can relate to this post more than most of us. As for the fans, I don't know what it is. The same attraction that makes them try to flush toys down the commode, I guess. Just to see if they can.

      It sounds to me like your friend is an awesome father who hasn't forgotten what it was like to be a little boy. Never a dull moment!

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  17. I have a 3 year old granddaughter and I think some of the items here might apply to her. I'm just glad my son doesn't have a ceiling fan.

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    1. HA! Our daughter, being the youngest, picked up some of her brothers' attributes, as well.

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  18. ... ever since my kids were born, they did their own thing, friend Sue ... seems like was standing by and gave them a good education ... and sense of travelling ... Daughter Mary has 3 degrees and keeps travelling England and Scotland for a month ... my heavy duty mechanic son Paul is travelling Canada, USA and Mexico for a year ( are in St Pauls, NC right now) and Jenny travelled never to return to Heaven ... but what do you do when you live in a shoe ... I wonder what Pearl would say to this ... Anyway, love always, cat. Anyway ... Paul is travelling by van ... here is the address if you are interested to see: @paulleanneandavan or paulleanneandavan.wixsite.com/paulleanneandavan ... just sayin ... Love, cat.

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    1. Wow. I looked at your son's blog. Traveling throughout N.A. in a van is quite an undertaking! It sounds to me like you raised some genuine adventurers, dear cat. You should be proud. You gave them wings. :)

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    2. ... thanks, Pearl ... smiles ... Love, cat.

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    3. Nope, not Pearl. Just me. :)

      I think Pearl would be a little more protective and more likely to clip her kids' wings than you or I.

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  19. The Boys did some amazing things but nothing with fire and smoke, Thank Goodness. I have gotten off pretty easy but that time I saw them coming down a expert slope on snowboards (when snowboard first appeared) son dressed in a tux and zoom past us while I was on the Ski lift... . .

    My 6 month old puppy is so funny exploring everything. Barking and a Scottish gurrrl has helped him explore his new world. Plus running at top speed and then putting on the brakes while sliding into a wall. All gud !

    Great post.
    cheers, parsnip

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    1. ps... Not sure where Paul from the above comment is traveling in Mexico but... I live on the Border and the violence is picking up and boiling over into Border Towns so much more now. Not sure what is going on but the last six years the violence is building more and more. It is not good. Plus durning the Holidays Guns are used so much more to celebrate. I am not sure if he is traveling alone but even with a friend it is not a good thing.
      At least trip advisory (?) is starting to list the letters telling of the violence against women.
      And then the robbery/beating, kidnapping and extortion. Yikes.
      I am not sure what to say but be sure you are safe.

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    2. ... Paul is travelling with his lovely Leanne and cat Benny ... @paulleanneandavan

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    3. In a tux??? Hmmm, sounds like the beginning of a terrific story. Sounds like something James Bond would do. (The Sean Connery version... he always looked dashing in a tux.)

      Everything about that puppy is all gud. (I still say some OTHER dog snuck in and dug that hole in your yard...)

      Thank you for caring enough about the welfare of cat's son to mention the violence. That was very sweet of you. (Not that I'm surprised.)

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    4. I did not want to be a downer but I know a photographer who depending on the season, takes photo of the animals of the desert down to the mexican border. He never crosses over into Mexico, the police will shot you, and with his small crew he has carried a visible gun at his waist for about 7 or 8 years now. The cartel violence is everywhere now.

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  20. That list brought a smile to my lips. I am so glad we never had a ceiling fan!

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    1. I think a lot of people are glad to have raised sons without the "benefit" of a ceiling fan. :)

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  21. I love the "Raising Boys" list. The hairspray on dust bunnies really cracked me up.

    Unfortunately my father was a cross between Hitler and Attila the Hun, so I wasn't allowed to do anything that "normal" boys were supposed to do. That's why I went completely insane when I finally hit 18 or 20. And I never stopped....

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    1. It's never too late to enjoy a happy second childhood, cowboy. Indulge yourself.

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  22. I haven't had much experience with little boys..that is until my grandson came along.

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  23. Love the list! (I have three boys).

    And about a ...3-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant... - it's the same in the grocery store. My youngest was an early reader (a very early reader with a piercing voice). One time, in the grocery store, he asked me, "Mom, what are extra-absorbent sanitary pads?"

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    1. Oh My Goodness, I love this although I am glad it happened to you and not me !

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    2. I love it, too. Kids have a way of saying the most embarrassing things in the loudest possible voice at the most awkward times and places. When our kids were little, I believed in giving them straightforward age-appropriate answers to their questions about sex. When our older son was about four or five, he informed his friends at church in a VERY LOUD VOICE what the correct name was for male genitalia...

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    3. *Snort!* Now I'm glad THAT happened to you and not me...

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  24. Snips and snails, And puppy-dogs' tails
    That's what little boys are made of!
    CLICK HERE for Bazza’s capricious Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

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    1. Yep. It's somewhat amusing when parents try to raise their children in a manner designed to thwart stereotypical behavior. Doesn't work, because boys and girls ARE inherently different. Vive la difference!

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  25. That list is hysterical, Susan! I'll never forget my little son marching back from the bathroom of a fancy-schmantzy restaurant, his hands aloft, loudly exclaiming: "Grandpa, I made one THIS long!"

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    1. HA! I'd say that's a boy thing, because our sons certainly pulled the same kind of thing, but one of our granddaughters exited the bathroom once and proudly announced that she'd "pooped a brick." (sigh) Then again, at least we weren't in a fancy restaurant...

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  26. Fun! I love this list. Thank you!

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  27. As a girl I loved a good fight and a tree climb, though my brother made a few more trips to hospital to have his face sewn back together, I wasn't lacking. My son and daughter were both fairly equal in recklessness, and my middle granddaughter is the most bold of those little risk takers, so nurture must have a part to play. But above any gender expectations/differences - hilarious anecdotes of childhood are absolute treasure :-)
    We don't have ceiling fans, but I wish we had! xx

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    1. Maybe nurture does play a part. I was a bit of a tomboy, too, but rarely pulled stunts as reckless as the boys I knew.

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  28. Reading that list did make me smile ... thank you.
    Makes me glad we never had a ceiling fan in our house!

    All the best Jan

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    1. Happy to make ya smile!

      Yeah, ceiling fans and little boys make for some interesting adventures...

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  29. Hahaha! Life is full of lessons, isn't it. We raised two boys and learned quite a bit as well.

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    1. Yep. We might do a lot of the teaching while raising kids, but they do their share of schooling us, as well. :)

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  30. Oh Susan, I never had the pleasure of raising a boy... although I have to say Valentina was pretty close to it when she was younger. She always wanted to mix items together to see what she could make from it... not to mention using spray oil on the TV... and toothpaste all over the walls...

    She was mild compared to what I here some boys can do, thankfully she never got into bringing bugs into the house... lol

    All I remember was when I went to visit my sister who had two teenagers at the time, we went to a pizza shop and I watched them eat 2 massive pieces each and my daughter and I ate one each... I looked at her and said I would never complain about how much food went through my house again... haha... my sister said she could never keep food in the house with the boys... xox

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    1. Hi-ya, Launna. Long time, no hear. I hope you're feeling better.

      There's definitely a difference between raising sons vs. raising daughters, but one the big thing they have in common: they teach us parents a lot of things in the process.

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